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February 3, 2014

A Canuck in Kantuck: The search of the missing wallet

LAUREL COUNTY, Ky. — I was running on empty this morning after I dropped Gabrielle off at school and swung into the gas station to fill up. I had popped open the gas cap, turned off the car and then started digging in my purse for my wallet. Except my new, beautiful wallet I’d gotten for Christmas wasn’t in there.

It was while searching the floor boards that I had a very clear vision of what my wallet looked like in the front of the grocery cart the afternoon before. I then tried to have an equally clear vision of what happened to the wallet after that but: Nothing.

Then, just to be sure I wasn’t crazy, I looked in my purse again. Was it really gone? Had I overlooked the zip-up, snakeskin wallet that had been one of my favorite gifts and that contained $80 in cash, my driver’s license, health insurance cards and bank and credit cards?

Turns out: No. No, I hadn’t.

So, with 10 miles left to spare showing on my gas gauge, I started the 15-minute drive home. How was I feeling? Trying to talk myself down, frankly. I told myself I wasn’t going to run out of gas because who, really, runs out of gas in this day and age? And my wallet was probably sitting peaceably on the kitchen island just waiting to have a big laugh with me once I got home.

But as I drove, my eyes darting back and forth from the gas gauge to my purse, which I really wanted to search again just to be sure, absolutely sure, it really wasn’t in there, I tried to reconstruct my trip to the grocery store the day before.

Not wanting to bring in my purse, which, umm, didn’t match my outfit, I had just taken the wallet inside. I then went to the other side of the store where they keep the mini carts, which I’m not sure they have in London, but are terribly convenient when you have to get too much stuff for a basket but not enough to warrant the clunky full-size buggy. I had picked up Clorox, No Yolks, sour cream and dill.

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Now that school is out, what are your family’s summer vacation plans?

A. No major plans. We will probably hang out around Laurel County.
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