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March 25, 2014

A Canuck in Kantuck: Keeping track

(Continued)

LAUREL COUNTY, Ky. —

My friends, especially my younger ones, marvel at the fact that I still keep a traditional day timer. To them it’s akin to staying true to a typewriter or a Betamax.

“It all syncs up together,” they say, showing me their glowing phones and promising seamless day planning.

So I tried one week to get into the digital way of doing things. It was, I can unequivocally report, a disaster. First, it takes forever to text in the day’s duties — I haven’t mastered the two-thumb technique so my index finger looks like I’m trying to harpoon a fish with every letter — and half the time it autocorrects what I put in so that “meet B. Sizer” turned into “Vic Size eg.” Second, I had alarm bells going off every few hours for events I had inputted so I was in a constant state of panic.

“Quack, quack!” my phone would scream and I’d levitate off my chair in fear.

I’d look down and realize I was supposed to get my hair cut in 10 minutes and so bolt out of the house and forget my phone on the dining room table, resulting in, hello, me being without my phone and my day timer.

Of course, this all stems from the fact that I am badly in need of a better memory. Many people, I’ve noticed, are able to mentally keep track of their day’s responsibilities without any outside help. One of my friends, Sarah, even knows what day of the week a date falls on a month out. The other day, actually on Feb. 4, we were walking in the subdivision and I asked her about the possibility of a birthday dinner for our friend Candice.

“What about the 27th? I know it’s a long way out, but keep it in mind.”

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Now that school is out, what are your family’s summer vacation plans?

A. No major plans. We will probably hang out around Laurel County.
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