By Magen McCrarey
LAUREL COUNTY, Ky. —
Freezing rain poured heavily overhead as I gave my hair and makeup one last glance in the mirror before dashing out the front door onto an ice skating rink last Friday. The pristine scene of my glossy street and polished car caught my eye faster than a sale at Macy’s, and I soon realized that I was unintentionally sliding across my driveway feet-first.
I felt like a wet noodle as I attempted to make my way safely back to the front door. After the rain and drizzle that morning it only took a matter of seconds before the Laurel County roadways, my driveway and vehicle were all slathered in ice, and for the first time this year, I got my winter wonderland wish.
I soon regretted waking up at dawn to get ready for work and a trip to Louisville that I’d never make it to. I should have just stayed tucked snugly inside my cozy bed. I felt downtrodden and crushed among many other adjectives about my situation, enslaved by the icy flume-like road ahead.
I entertained ideas of strapping myself to a sled to get to work, inching my way down the steep incline leading to U.S. 25 on my bottom, or even getting on all fours to crawl carefully backwards down the hill. But all those silly ideas exhausted me, and who was I kidding? There was absolutely no way I could have made it to work. I eventually gave in after a couple of hours attempting to email and network from home and cracked open a good book and lit the fireplace.
My housemate, Mrs. Huff brightened up my afternoon with homemade potato soup and southern iced tea as we braved the lazy day, one unhurried hour at a time. In the afternoon, I eventually left my comfort zone at the threshold to salt the driveway once and for all — before any more ice decided to come down and take up residence. By nightfall, I had missed an involuntary full day of work, scraped off a quarter of an inch of ice off of two vehicles and watched a couple brave neighbors spin out in an unsuccessful quest to leave home.
All in all, I collected that icy roadways are nothing to mess with, and staying home is the greatest alternative anyone can have. Then again, Albert Einstein, one of the most intelligent people in history, was recorded saying, “a person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.”
Maybe next time London freezes over, I’ll try one of my silly ideas.