LAUREL COUNTY, Ky. — Regardless of the date on the calendar, it is summer.

The sweltering sun that cast its powerful heat rays over the state recently has turned our bluegrass into a crispy brown remnant more symbolic of crisped rice than desirable lawns. The smell of the fragrant fresh-cut grass once so pleasant on the nostrils has been replaced with a pugnant dust similar to that of a burn pile as the mower blades slice into the too-dry grass.

With water levels significantly below their usual numbers, the cost of water will most likely be the next increase in prices as people strive to keep their lawns in some semblance of a greenish, summer color while also maintaining their floral decor both inside and out.

Gardening and farming fanatics look out among their light brown garden rows and crops with a leary eye, hoping that rain will soon come — a slow, soaking rain that will provide badly needed moisture to wiltering crops rather than the more common quick, furious downpours of mini-rivers that wash away the topsoil toward the closest incline.

The summer heat takes its toll on all ages. Children who, generations ago, spent the majority of their days alternating between the summer sun and shaded areas outside, take even more refuge in the air conditioning of indoors where the Internet and cable television offer cooler and more comfortable means of ‘creativity.’ Adults follow suit, vainly attempting to schedule their outdoor work during either early morning or late evening hours, hiding in the cooler temperatures of offices and buildings that blast convenient cool from overhead vents. Those laborers whose jobs require exposure to the radiant heat simulate children of the past — lingering when possible in either natural or make-shift shade or taking refuge in air conditioned equipment that deflects a portion of the humid air pocket that signifies summer.

For those middle-aged women undergoing hormonal changes, the summer heat is representative of a malfunctioning thermostat that short-circuits on a regular basis. Even those who have passed the age and stage of menopausal insanity are melting in the heat. Those 50-plusers who passed the initial stages of menopause may experience recurrences of the power surges that ignite the upper extremities in a torrent of hot flashes.

Tablets and any other slightly flat surfaced objects become impromptu fans in a feeble and futile attempt to chase away the latest heat surge and air conditioning units are stretched to their highest potential to lower the unpredictably timed gushes of hot that rage unexpectedly within the body. Bed covers, perhaps once slightly rumpled from the night’s wear, become tangled masses as the hot flashes roust a deadfast sleep into a sweat-riddled awakening. Morning coffee becomes a boiling thermometer gauge that spirals the heat into another phase that seemingly sets the pace for a sporadic epidemic of hot flashes that continue at the most unexpected, uncomfortable times and places imaginable.

An educated and experience physician, concerned about potential health problems, asked a simple question recently that spawned a couple of irate thoughts before a calmer and more logical answer was given in return.

Reviewing medical symptoms and possible problems, I was asked if I “sweat.” The first thoughts flashing across my brain was a tort reply of: “I’m 55 years old, overweight, a smoker, who just walked a half-block in 90 degree heat and up an incline to your office. Should I be sweating?”

However, since the purpose of the doctor visit was to examine potential health problems for a possible solution, I chose what I deemed a more appropriate answer:

“It’s summer. It’s almost 90 degrees. Of course, I sweat. Everybody sweats in this kind of weather.”

I just wish the hot flashes would quit.



njohnson@sentinel-echo.com